The Vows We Don’t Realize We’re Making

As I prepare for the release of my new book, Create Your Own Table: A Guide to Discovering Your Purpose, I wanted to share a personal reflection from one of the chapters that had a profound impact on my life. It’s a moment that revealed how our words—especially those spoken in frustration or pain—can quietly shape our future without us even realizing it.

When I moved to New York City, I felt an overwhelming sense of relief—like I was shedding a life that had grown far too heavy to carry. But this wasn’t just about changing zip codes. I was releasing the weight of homeownership: the bills, the upkeep, the never-ending responsibilities. I told myself, with conviction, that I never wanted to deal with any of it again. And I meant it.

At the time, it felt like liberation. But in that emotional release—driven by burnout and a desperate need for change—I didn’t recognize the power of what I was saying. I wasn’t just making a decision. I was making a vow. A vow rooted in emotional exhaustion and resistance, one that would quietly shape how I viewed stability, success, and even the idea of home itself.

I’m sharing this not just to tell you my “house” story, but because I believe we all have our own version of this. Maybe it’s a job that drained you. A relationship that left you shattered. A financial situation that made you feel powerless. And in those moments, we often make silent promises—ones meant to protect us, but that eventually become invisible walls we can’t seem to break through.

What I didn’t realize then was that my vow had planted a belief deep in my subconscious: that homeownership equals struggle. That stability comes at the cost of freedom. So even when the idea of owning property came up again, I felt unexplained resistance. My spirit would pull back, and I couldn’t understand why—until I traced it back to the vow I’d made years earlier.

Here’s what’s so fascinating: I was aware of many of the classic financial blocks. I’d done the work to challenge beliefs like “money is the root of all evil” or “rich people are selfish.” But this one was different. It wasn’t someone else’s story—it was mine, born from my own lived experience. And that made it harder to spot.

That’s the tricky part. We’re taught to guard ourselves from limiting beliefs handed down by society, family, or culture. But what happens when those beliefs are born from our own pain, wrapped in logic, and disguised as protection?

That’s when healing becomes even more important. Because it’s one thing to release what never belonged to you. It’s another to unlearn what you created in order to survive. But once you become aware of these inner vows, you regain your power. You get to rewrite the script.

So I’ll leave you with this:

As you think about your own journey, ask yourself—What vow might you have made in a moment of pain? And more importantly... is it still serving you?

As always, I hope what I share brings value to your life. I would like to sign up information on my upcoming book launch, please click HERE.

In Love & Light,

Heather